African-American Issues

Why do People think that African American Men Cheat more than White Men



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This whole issue is about the so called lack of fidelity among black men. Why do they not value one to one relationships, and why is there such a lack of concern for social and moral standards amongst our black men.

Yes, I was one who believed this, when my own spouses cheated on me I thought that all black men were the same irrespective of what race they came from. I saw them as being dogs, going from one woman to another not caring about the social and moral consequences. But when you meet other women from different races you begin to quickly understand that this is not a black problem, this is a man problem. Unfortunately for black men, the problem of male infidelity has rested squarely on their shoulders, because it is spoken about openly in the black communities, more so than in other ethnic community groups, and as a result black men are viewed and spoken of by other ethnic groups as being sexually deviant.

Black men and women are more likely to be spoken of in derogatory terms, black sexuality is one of those areas, that features high on the social issue agenda that affect the black population, that links into drugs, black on black crime, HIV, scholastic under achievement, unwanted pregnancies etc. Among other ethnic groups, the problem is just as bad but it is more of a taboo and can lead to the social stigmatisation of a woman if she speaks openly of his adultery or even tries to leave him.

White men have been cheating on their spouses from time immemorial, there has been very high profile cases from socialites to royalty to politicians who cheat on their spouses, whether they have been in a conjugal relationship or otherwise, but it is the sophisticated manner in how both parties deal with it that leads others to view black men as being the biggest cheats.

The problem of infidelity among black men had its roots in slavery; it was not uncommon for slave owners to break-up black families by sending black men away from their families if they appeared to be strong and virile, particularly for the purposes of procreation. It is not surprising that this is inculcated in the psyche of black men and they have developed this propensity towards infidelity.

Black sexuality was immortalised by the Grecians. It was not unusual for the images of the black male to be depicted in a sexually explicit way with oversized genitals. To the ancient Egyptians, sexuality was not a taboo matter, they also believed that sexuality was an important part of life and it is debatable as to whether fidelity within marriage was regarded sacred. The traditional family way of life is valued highly among Africans from the mother land, but it was the onslaught of slavery that had an everlasting impact on black males.

Life is a journey which began the day black men were born; they had no plans or ambitions, because society showed them who they are and who they must be which was their destiny. The images of who they were to become passed before them, they saw before them, hatred, inequality, greed, lust, poverty, failure and destitution. The destiny that lies before them is their destiny to search for who they are, and who they must become in a world that has been more than inhuman to them.

 

More about this author: Ruth Jacob

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